Italian Divorce Court

Angelina and Giuseppi were standing before the judge in divorce court.

Angelina says, "Your honor, we benna marry 25 years ana Giuseppi he'always pickn a his nose

ana when we maka love he's a never letsa me on top.  I justa canna taka dis anymore."

The judge listens solemnly and then addresses Giuseppi.  "Giuseppi, isa dis true.  You always a picka your nose and you never let Angelina on top?

What have you gotta say fora yourself?" Giuseppi says, "Well your honor, itsa true.

I picka my nose a lot and, yeah, Angelina, I tella her she'sa gotta be onna da bottom.

Itsa all go's aback to when I'mma a younga boy.  My poppa, he's a very smarta man.

I always follow ev'ryting he'sa say.  My poppa one day he says, "Giuseppi, I gotta tella you da two main secrets ofa hava successful life:"

Number one -you always keepa your nose clean.

Ana number two - never screw up.

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